EVERY THOUGHT OF DEFENCE, CREATES AN INSTANT OFFENCE

I sat in my car in front of my parents’ house. I did not want to go in. 

Why? Because I was tired of protecting myself, emotionally, shielding and trying to navigate conversations away from thin ice all the time. I was tired of conflicts. I brought attention back into my own body. I was scanning and relaxing. And suddenly, I realised: how can I not expect a fight when I go in with my defences and armours fully erected? If I put my defence up, then this is exactly what I am expecting and therefore creating! 

I let go. I allowed myself to take it all in and allow it through me. I decided to create something different. A relation. A communication. Helpfulness and love. I allowed myself to integrate that “It is safe. No one is here to get me. I am love. They are love. And this is the level from which we are going to communicate and relate from.” 

And so it began. My first fully aware visit to my parents’ with my kids. It was filled with simple things, connections and ease. 

As physical beings, we are predominantly living in a dual mindset. When we are not aware of the illusionary nature of this mindset, we take it with us, even when we turn “spiritual” in our ways and thoughts. I have noticed, mostly through the experiences of my clients but also through my own very transformational and groundbreaking experiences when I was still new to all this, that there is a whole skene of spiritual/new age people who call themselves the “warriors of the light” and talk about creating protection against “dark forces”, purifying spaces and people etc. 

“Take this amulet, it will protect you!” “Beware of the egregors!” “Clean the room energetically before you go!” The “devil” is in the details. ;) When we pay attention to what we say and think, we can start to question the validity of our beliefs. 

Another side of it comes out when people start talking about emotions like villains and insist on getting rid of them, instead of accepting, observing, welcoming and transforming. Or when you try to simply and clearly look at a current reality of a situation (roots deeply in the calm and vast ocean of reality) and they call this “lack consciousness” and “you are only to think abundant thoughts, mkay?” Ok. What if I don’t? What if I accept myself as Pure Light who turns everything she touches into gold? :)

It really reminds me of Harry Potter and his reluctance to call Voldemort anything else but Voldemort. Really. In order to change something, I have to shine light to it, call it by its name and see it and acknowledge it first. And you can’t do that if you turn some topics or views or words or thoughts or states of being into “persona non gratas”. All. Is. Allowed.

It is not about lack or abundance, it is about the reality of limitlessness and the spontaneous suitability of whatever is. The mission of a Light Being is to allow the spirit to materialise and the matter to become enlightened. It is to turn duality into non-duality, into One. 

So.  I do not fight duality, I do not go against it, and I am certainly not afraid of it or make my decisions based on it. I simply accept it and ignore it simultaneously. 

You see, it comes down to how you define yourself: who do you believe yourself to be? When you see yourself as a warrior, you simultaneously create war and solidify the dual mindset. You see yourself as one side of a coin: defence-offence; control-abandonment; lack-abundance; screaming-whispering… etc. Every coin always has two sides and when you focus on one side, you will, naturally, make the other side more real too. 

A great example to this is my most recent client who said that after her other “therapist” told her to “work on raising her vibration”, she has been experiencing more and more “attacks” upon herself from the outside. 

Now, a person in a totally dual mindset, might conclude that “yes, they are here to get you, they have noticed your light and they want to take you down”. 

But dear one. THIS is just a wound you carry. This is a non-real belief about this universe that you hold and this has NOTHING to do with the reality of who you are, who God is how this whole thing works. 

You are a humble, untouchable, and all-mighty Being of Light. And the quality of everything you create is dependant upon your ability to know and embody your being every single second. 

Welcome to duty. All is done. Life is simple like that. I can relax more in my body because I don't fear future events and I have gotten out of the alarm position.

IIDALA aka Iida-Leena Materasu is a professional therapist, writer, author, spiritual guide, mother, woman, and human. She facilitates breathwork and self-development groups, offers courses, subscription programs, and silent nature hikes as well as receives private clients live and via zoom all over Europe. For a powerful Talk&Heal session or other therapy sessions like breathwork or cranio, courses or programs, feel free to explore the website or contact directly.

www.iidala.com